In lieu of Morning Pages

Today I didn’t have time to write my morning pages. There were animals to feed and more pressing matters. So this will be the ramblings of a somewhat unsettled mind. Heads up. 

 

I’ve been thinking lately a bit about the meaning of life or rather what it means to be alive. So often we don’t really consider the first words Jesus asked two disciples who started following him, “What do you want?” [John 1:35-39].

 

He didn’t ask them what they needed at that moment or what other people thought about them or about their situation. He didn’t ask them what their families’ expectations were or what their teachers and mentors had encouraged them to pursue. He didn’t ask them to study law or medicine or engineering. He didn’t start with the answer which He already actually knew. He asked them what they wanted. 

 

When they called him Rabbi/teacher and asked where He was staying, He simply instructed them to come along and see. 

 

It’s a short section of the first chapter of John and could be glossed over as rather insignificant. I suspect, however, that it is critically important. I tend to believe that the Bible is like an intricate tapestry. No thread is unimportant, no detail there by chance. It matters where our minds and hearts are. It matters what we want in our walk with Christ. We can come and see and follow and develop what we want by discovering what God wants for us.

 

Being alive in the biological sense is something far less than actually living a sentient, meaningful existence. That’s why some of us choose to make Living Wills and give our loved ones instruction on what to do in the event of a “being alive” and prolonging inevitable death, vs. actually living situation. Living a life worth living matters.

 

I think often we are given purpose, and, in our hearts and minds, this purpose is what we want for ourselves when we are younger and less influenced by others in this world. It is easy to place too much importance on the desires of well-intentioned parents or mentors and not enough importance on the inner voice guided by God. The tug of war is knowing the difference between selfish wants and purpose-driven, living type wants. When we give ourselves over to the Lord’s plan, we can often rediscover this purpose type want and come into alignment. We get a chance to come and see what is intended and beautifully created for each of us.   

 

Ramble over for today. Go seek and live your life that’s worth living.

Living Slowly

I had planned to have some work in progress photos to share, and while that could be lovely, I’ve honestly not had a lot of time to spare lately. My mother and father-in-law have come up from Peru for an extended visit, and while they are very helpful, it’s a busy season here on the homestead. Having two additional adults who need to eat their main meal around 1-2PM has shifted my entire daily schedule. Add to that other friends and family day-trip visits on account of the warm summer weather, and my routines are often disrupted. 

 

It would be easy to just throw my hands up and not continue to live intentionally. To just say, “Screw it, whatever,” and just live in a reaction mode. I find that to be counterproductive in reducing anxiety. I was speaking with my brother recently about our mother’s propensity for finding four-leaf clovers. My nephew and I both appear to have inherited the ability, and something he said to me struck me as being true for me too. He said that if he sets out looking specifically for four-leaf clovers, he doesn’t find them. Think about that for a moment, when he makes it his purpose to just look for them, he doesn’t find any. 

 

When we take the time to slow down while doing our daily chores or while spending time with family, if we relax our minds to be present in the moment, wherever we are, then we can see the four-leaf clovers amidst the hundreds of regular three-leafers. When I’m not so focused on getting from point A to point B, making a meal because it has to be done, bathing a baby because she has to be bathed, but I take the time to exist in that moment, on that day, on this trip around the sun, there is a richness of detail – the aroma of fresh ginger, the wet curls on my daughter’s head, the tiny veins on a clover leaf – that I would miss completely in my rush. 

 

How do you take time to live intentionally, to live slowly, each day?